Popeye Theophilus Barrnumb presents.... and then some....
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The P-t-B.com
Archival Recap
of a
New Era


For those who may BE confused, forgetful, new, and/or such, I, the One and ONLY, SpyDrMAN, oops, I mean, Popeye, (well, both, right now, anyways, and forEver hereAfter.... along wit' Wolverine!, tGoSP, BlueWolf, et al.) offer up a shortish bout of explanatia and apologia as to What in the Hell "this" is all about. Just CLICK HERE and you will immediately and without haste or prejudice BE transmogrified below, wherein you will BE enlightened, educated, deConfused, and so on, and so forth. Good luck with that.

Otherwise, please doo enjoy the entertainment We have provided for all you all, beginning.... now....

To reiterate from below....

And, now, I bring you the continued and continual and never-ending Most Well-Deserved Biatch Slapping of the New Millennium.... enjoy....


X 10 Dead Abril Foolz

Wherein Popeye perks people's attention as He silently whispers sweet nuthings in forms of the verb to BE.


I'm Back, Bitch

Wherein Popeye returns with a reVengeance.


If you attempt to prick Me,
doo I not say, "Whoa! Step back, little man!"?
(not that there's anything wrong with 'that')
if you tickle Me,
doo I not giggle, snicker, *laffz*, and Howl?
if you physically, chemically poison Me,
(for my Spirit is ever untouchable, inviolate, incorruptible and pure)
doo I not walk it off, and live on in aeternity,
after exclaiming, "Inconceivable!"?
          and if you wrong Me,
even in the slightest
                                        of petty and impotent manners,
doo I not Revenge?
                              — Willem the Konqueror
                                                                                anno domini 2004, cinco de abril
                                                                      (with oh so many apologies to the bard)

  Count on it!
              The Book of Counted Sorrows


Danse My Little Bitchz, Danse

Wherein Popeye plays a little tune for the masses.

What would you do if I played out of tune?
Would you stand up and walk out on me?
Lend me your ears and I'll play you a song.
And I will try to play out of key.


Like Sandz Thru the HourGlass....

Wherein Popeye gets and gives Religion.... of sorts....
The implications are staggering!

For everything there is a season,
And a time for every matter under heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die;
A time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal;
A time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh;
A time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to throw away stones,
     and a time to gather stones together;
A time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to seek, and a time to lose;
A time to keep, and a time to throw away;
A time to tear, and a time to sew;
A time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate,
A time for war, and a time for peace.
                Ecclesiastes 3:1-8


For Whom the Bells Toll....

Wherein Popeye pointedly makes a pointed point.

Whittle away a sharp stick
Whistle while you work
Test it — Use it
Whistle while you play
    — The Book of Counted Sorrows



Wherein Popeye snickers a little snickerdoodle.

'Cuz the times, they are a changin'.
And the beat goes on.... staccato....


The God of Ants *laffz*

Wherein Popeye reintroduces tGoA.
And events take a turn for the hearse....


Beat me, Hurt me, Make me Scream

Wherein Popeye induces certain individuals' sphincters and bladders to seize up and then release in a sloppy Danse of Disquietude.



Wherein Popeye poses the question:
"Sloppy seconds anyone?"


I gots Moxie.... And you doo not

Wherein Popeye takes a moment to gloat The Truth.


The Mirror of Truth Hurtz

Wherein Popeye holds The Mirror of Truth up to certain individuals' faces and they recoil and cringe in horrific terror and vomitory self-disgust.


The InJustice of Non-Death

Wherein Popeye colorfully and graphically states yet another Universal Truth.

Can not doo what SpyDrMAN can
Spins a web, of big lies
He's a thief, he whines and cries
Look out! He's a smelly SpDrMN!!
Is he wrong? Listen good
He's got yellow cowardly blood
Him doo give nasty head
We all hope, he is dead
Hey there! Bye-bye to SpDrMN!!
In the thrill of the Smite
I doo cream when I rhyme
All doo know I am Right
Been known to Drop a Dime
Cowardly yellow SpDrMN
Poor and dim, often whored
Kneepads are his reward
Look out! He's nasty SpDrMN!!
To him, life is a greek night gang bang
Whereever there's an ill wang
There BE SpDrMN!!!



Wherein Popeye humorously ponders the amaranthine Comedic Tragedy of the status quo.


The Punisher

Wherein Popeye shows yet another side of his true self in near photo-realistic wonder and awe. Ain't I some'in'?


Yer an Idiot!

Wherein Popeye drops his notorious catch phrase.
We all knew it had to happen sometime.

With a Michael Moore update regards his new award-winning documentary Fahrenheit 911.


Parody? Parody. Parody!

Wherein Popeye reminds the dimwitted, ignorant, uneducated, under-educated, uninformed, misinformed, unaware and unwashed peonic masses, yet again, what the concept of parody is all about.
They ain't none too brite, is they?


You BEen Licked

Wherein Popeye drives home the above point with a homerun grand slam, still batting .950.



Wherein Popeye makes a funny.
The Humor of Truth
   often stings the most. – The AnonyMouse Gerbil


GimMe That Olde Time Religion

Wherein Popeye makes well-known what Jesus would doo to certain individuals for their well-known wrongful actions and words. Just a small reminder.

Gawd shall smite thee, but I cannot wait! — Wolverine!

Direct line wisdom from The God of Skinny Punks, who sits at the right hand of The God of Ants. Yer welcome.


I AM Immortal.

        (So far, anyway.)

Wherein Popeye whispers....
BE afraid. BE very afraid.


Self Explanatory

Wherein Popeye takes a life snapshot of Reality.
Oy, what a tangled web 'we' weave....


The Golden Child

Wherein Popeye observes —
Ouch! That's gotta hurt!!

Listen, and learn, Grasshoppers — The thorn defends the rose. It harms only those who would steal the blossom from the plant.


Grrl Power

Wherein Popeye makes yet another observation based on objective truth and reality. Such a sad state of affairs....



Wherein Popeye scares the holy living shit out of certain individuals who shall not BE named at this point in time, although "everyone" knows who they are.

Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death
   that brings total obliteration. – Herbert
It is better to be feared than loved,
   if you cannot be both. – Niccolo Machiavelli
Fear of something is at the root of hate for others,
   and hate within will eventually destroy the hater.
       – George Washington Carver
Only fools have no fear. – Worf, ST:TNG


Paxton Linnea Quigley Down Under

Wherein Popeye takes aim at all of the many various forms of assininity, stupidity, ignorance, immorality, and other unethical and hurtful attitudes, viewpoints and behaviours of you know whom.


Deja Vu

Wherein Popeye offers up a collage of humorous unfortunateness that bitchslaps them with their own unfortunate, hurtful and self-destructive issues.


Stick a Fork in You....

Wherein Popeye offers to aerate people's spiritual corpus and perform a health-based olde fashioned bloodletting.
Free gratis no charge.



Wherein Popeye fearlessly plasters a webcam photograph all over Hell and back again and briefly discusses the Fear of Forks.

Also the reintroduction of The Official Mary-Kate and Ashley Countdown to Legality graphical display counter.


Popeye Wants You!

Wherein Popeye makes a simple request that can not be denied.


A Collage of a Different Color

Wherein Popeye shows off his skillz as a People Watcher.


Southern Park Place Reliquary

Wherein Popeye makes yet another hilariously funny comic that is informative as well as humorous beyond description.


Southern Park Place Redux

Wherein Popeye creates even more hilariously funny comic pablum that is even more informative and jocular beyond comprehension.


Monkey See, Monkey Doo

Wherein Popeye comments on Fellini's roots.... so to speak.


Dumb-Dumb, Dumb — Dumb....

Wherein Popeye comments on Mikey's roots.... so to speak.


The World's Smallest Violin

Wherein Popeye takes a brief hiatus so people can gather their breath after so much side-splitting and gut-busting laughter. Sorry about that.

Also The Official Mary-Kate and Ashley Countdown to Legality graphical display counter turns into an Ex-Virgin Watch up counter. Good luck with that grrlz.


Mommy Dearest and Her Sproggen

Wherein Popeye drives home yet another important point about you know whom, like Willie Mays hitting a homer.

A list is also sung regards a few of Popeye's favorite things.


Red, White, Black and Blue

Wherein Popeye makes people cry, but them's the breaks. Payback's a Bitch, ain't it? 'Specially when it's from someone other than who you wronged in the first place.
Someone recently said that the United States defends and protects the weak and the defenseless. I BElieve that is true, and should BE true, and is important. As a true Patriot,
I therefore choose to defend and protect those weaker and more defenseless than Myself. Which is pretty much everybody, so, as you can well-imagine, I tend to BE pretty busy. 'Cuz, as we all well-know, there are really and truly just
way too many lesser (Loser) people in the world today that choose to BE so much more less than what a normal, decent, caring, empathetic human BEing should BE. And they are all fair game.
So.... Let the Games BEgin!
      (as if they ever ended)


The BEginning of The End

Wherein Popeye, in all His magnificent BEnevolence, educates certain known individuals as to their immediate future plight, so that they may BEgin to make final preparatory arrangements as they deem necessary, BEfore it is too late and they find themselves caught short.

P.S. & btw — I have discovered yet another way to make money off of "all this crap." Since SpDrMN is dead (apparently), all of his so-called "graphx" (icons, whatever you want to call them and whatever they are), are now in the public domain. So I have gathered them up and repackaged them and am offering them for a small charge, to anyone who is interested, in various non-english speaking countries (where they, for some unknown and unfathomable reason, are somewhat sought out, if not actually popular – go figure). It's not a lot of money, of course, but, after a few hundred sales, or so, it's a $1,000.00, or so, extra that I wouldn't have otherWise, so I ain't complaining. (as you know I never doo) It'll patch a few leaks, get Me another big hard disk and another half-Gig of RAM computer memory, and replace some spent ammo and some other perishables and such. Plus My standard 10% tithe to the non-profit charitable organization of My choice and fancy. Ain't I some'in'?


The Drowning Diaries

Wherein Popeye, The MajiScion, and part-time Madame Cruella Fortune Teller Xtraordinaire and Futurist, shows what has happened, what is currently happening, and what will happen and continue to happen in the near and not so distant future.

I will not BE satisfied
until Justice flows
like raging waters
and Righteousness
as a mighty flood

He also sings a song for six pence while looking like He has a pocket full of wrye bread loaf in the front of His trousers and all the womyn-folk swoon and gasp and hot-n-tot and kneel and pray to the One True G-d. Amen.

P.S. — It has BEen brought to My ever-lovin' attention
that someone has offered a $50.00 ReWard
for information leading to the capture of
My Blog.
May I one-up you on that, as usual?
Will you doo Me a favor.... and double that?
Yes, that's right.
I am personally offering a $100.00 ReWard
for anyone who can find ANY of My Blogs.
And here is a hintish clue:
there is more than one and less than four.
Good luck with that.
Ain't I some'in'?


Michael — Fvcking — Theroux

Wherein Popeye has so much funny Dropping a Dime on so-called Michael Theroux, regards a goldmine of discovered web treasure parody, and is so self-proud in that regard for the achievement, that He decides to treat Himself to a brand new better and more expensive chop-chop bag, 'cuz the old one has been kick-chopped to Hell and back again and had the stuffing slapped out of it, and so He doo. Butt, then He decides to paste a BLOWn up image of Mickey's ugly mug face on it for "kicks", and so He doo, butt then His extraordinairy sense of humor gets the best of Him, and He can't help butt drop trou', as well, and flop out his rather rigid third foot, and piss a quart wizz on the aforementioned ugly mugged face, as most people would, and so He doo, and, wouldn't you know it, the bag is then ruined BEyond repair and proper usage.

Michael Fvcking theroux!

ANYwho, doo check out this musical parody Spummage Supremium that was kindly donated to this website of contentional desolation by an apparently new band named Mo'z Art that is comprised of a salt and pepper team named Ima Dais and Wolfe Ghange. I offered to link to their website, butt they disInclined the INvitation. I doo BElieve that there is a group of people "out there" who are rather enjoing this little Peep Show I putz on here, and are getting with the program themselves and enhancing their enjoyment with various Side Shows of their own creation. Members Only, of course. Keep up the Good Workz, people, and let Me know if I can offer up more of your fine workz.
      XXX   OOO


It's All DunnHill from Here

Wherein Popeye sets the record straight.
In front of g0d and everyone.
And no one is surprised in the least.
Too bad only a handful "got the joke".


What Will You Doo???

Wherein Popeye instructs —

Doo nothing to anyone
that makes them stumble,
or hurts their conscience,
or offends, or weakens them,
unless it is in defense
of another or yourself,
to combat and vanquish
the actions and words
of a lesser one who is
the initial perpetrator
of such unnecessary harm
and hurtful actions —
you may
compromise on strategy,
but not on principal.



Fellini has Always BEen My Little Bitch

Wherein Popeye makes yet more apropos observations about the so-called life of one, "Fellini's 8 1/2". ("Celestin d'Olani", et al.) Hey! Fellini! Touched any munkeys lately???   (apologies to monkeys everywere)
"Fellini cum back!"


Once a Bitch, Always a Bitch!

Wherein Popeye speaks so much freakin' Truth it brings tears to people's eyes. Yeah — that must BE the reason why....

....last night I saw up on the stare,
a "little" man who BE not there,
He BE not there ag'in today,
oh, how I wish He'd go away!


The 10% Solution

Wherein Popeye let's people in on a previously unknown fact.

Revenge is best served sub-zero frozen icy cold on a PopSickIll stick up yer bloody ASS!

Meanwhile, Fellini's new job as a Honey Dipper is going as well as can BE expected. It's a shitty Job, butt Fellini doo loves too doo it.

Sandra's new job as a deFrocked Past Whore in search of a slimming Carnival funny mirror, and a boyishFriend who doo not pay by Habit after Ick, is still fruitLess and so a banananus shall BE her bestest friend 'til Hel pleases Ben Dover.

And Mikey?? Wellugh, he'z still gots hiz head up Me arse — not that I'm complainin', mind ya, butt one o' these daze I doo BElieve I will take a good healthy shit and that will BE the end of hiz so-called career. 'Bout time. Ya think?


What's Wong with this Photographic Imagery

Wherein Popeye does something.... interesting....

Actually, the many things I doo doo are Legion.

First and foremost, I have shown you know whom what lies in their eventual future. Isn't that special?

Next, when I REturned homage from this weekend's par-tay, par-tay, parrr-tay, it was brought to My attention that I have apparently BEen given UNdeserved credit for the musical parody Spummage Supremium that was graciously donated for inclusion on this website as mentioned above. This BEing done on the internet radio show about Reverse Speech by DJO hizzelf.

Yeah. Like I'm going to put something like that up, that is that good, and NOT take credit for it if I am the one who did it. I don't think so. I've thought about trying to create one of those music parodies, butt they look like a lot of work. Not that I don't appreciate people helping to make Me even more famous than I already am. (you know — REAL Fame — the kind you don't declare fer yerself every chance you get to whomever will listen, and all)

Anywayz, that should BE corrected. I guess I could demand a public "on air" retraction, or whatever it would BE called, butt, what-ev-er. I know that not everyone BElieves in the concept of Truth in Advertising like I doo. Not everyone BElieves in Truth, Honesty and Honor, like I doo. And so on.

And last and certainly least, I see that Sandra, a.k.a. Mustang Sally, et al., has BEen flapping her pie hole. Again. Still. Something about getting "medievil on My ass", or words to that affect, if I don't calm My shit down, or something like that. What-ev-er. That Coward Bitch doesn't know the meaning of Medieval, and still wouldn't if she looked it up in the dictionary. As if she even owns one. I think it's very fair to say that, based on the events of the last few years, My "Medievil" would make theirs look like a little girly pillow fight. Count on it.

That Stupid Cvnt is SO clueless, it actually boggles My mind. And that ain't easy. BElieve you Me. You would think they would have learned by now that I am UNtouchable, #1, #2, Fearless, and C), I like bananas. Makes you wonder exactly how freaking stoopid they really are. All you all seriously need to get your shit together and engage your tiny minds and puny brains and either start making some smarter decisions or making some positive changes in your so-called worthless lives BEfore.... wellugh, you know.

And if you don't.... then I guess Woe Unto Thee. At least you can't never say I didn't give you fair warning. I gave you all well more than enough chances. Infinitely more chances than you gave anyone else. And they didn't even deserve your bullShit, whereas you deserve everything you get, and more. And I will BE the one making sure you get it. Count on it. No need to thank Me.

And, if I may have the last words, as usual.

You fat OLD boBasTard Putzez are MegaLoozerz who are well past your prime, if you ever even had one, and I seriously doubt you ever really did, and you couldn't lick the runny ASS shit off a duck's anus correctly. With a manual. And prior training. And a cheat sheet. Where as I could doo it with My eyes closed.... I mean.... Ummm.... You know what I mean. That's the way it is and always will BE. Count on it.

Me thanks this'n sumz up das sit you aye shun suck sync t'ly:

Epsum salto factorialis non deposit quid pro quo hic escorol. Olympian quarrels et gorilla congolium sic ad nauseum. Souvlaki ignitus carborundum e pluribus unum. Defacto lingo est igpay atinlay. Marquee selectus non provisio incongruous feline nolo contendere. Gratuitous octopus niacin, sodium glutimate. Quote neon an estimate et non interruptus stadium. Sic tempus fugit esperanto hiccup estrogen. Glorious baklava ex librus hup hey ad infinitum. Non sequitur condominium facile et geranium incognito.
          — Guglielmo Tres Periodotus,
                Primus Quartium UniSeptiCum


And then there's this li'l ditty, as an addendum:

The avalanche has already started.
It is too late for the pebbles to vote.



Wherein Popeye makes "Fellini" whimper and cower, and it BEcomez crystal clear evident what kind of "friendz" he has (BEen) over on The Mediocre Whores bored. With friendz like that, who needs enemies? — or li'l ol' Me.

And, just so people don't think that everyone hates Me, or thinks what I'm dooing is "bad" or "evile", here are a few posts on the above-mentioned "forum" by persons somewhat unknown, that speak positively, or non-negatively, about l'il ol' Me. Some of them written quite eloquently, I must say. We thank you again for your support.

Re:If it's bad art, it's Poopeye
Reply #6 on: July 27, 2004, 05:33:04 pm
Read between the lines of what Popeye is. Not what he is
saying on every second line, but on every fourth and the
implications of the body of his message as a whole -- he is
unique and expressed himself in ways that are rarely if ever
seen and is definitely an eye full to read and a head full.
But if you look past his message to the WHY and WHAT of his
message, you begin to develop a clearer understanding of
what his speaches are all about and why they exist. He made
it his hobby to expose the things he felt was wrong,
exposing those who he feels were wronging others, and their
plight. He showed and made visible all of the things that
happen to people and who does it and why, and had the guts
to do it in a way that captures everyones attention, the
cute little ways he talks the talk and walks the walk.
So, like him or no, you have to admit that he spelled it out
clearly, and if you can't read between the lines he takes
great care to make certain to include lengthy analysis of
his findings and painstakingly explains away the fac ts in
detail, so even the novice reader can understand, even
someone from "out of the loop" can comprehend, even someone
with a modicum of IQ can grasp the gist of his messages. I
for one appreciate all the time and energy he's put into
solving the riddles over the years, it's nice to know
someone was paying attention.
Re:If it's bad art, it's Poopeye
Reply #7 on: July 27, 2004, 05:51:41 pm
Popeye is an enigma
when I see his funny smileys
and weird ways
it warms my heart
he's like a sudden attack of conscience
he shows us a side of himself that resembles the backside of
a sumo wrestler but all in all hes a good egg
I mean ya gotta think
he makes ya think and shows another prespective
yah gotta like that.
makes ya think.
and then think again
about the things that people think and doo and say
(not to copy him but they say that emulation is the finest
compliment one can have
So, after all is said and done
he comes out a winner in my book
you don't have to agree with me
and he probably wouldn't want it any other way
Popeye is Popeye and ya gotta think, would we want him any other way?
I think not.
Besides, he kills off the boredom. Gotta appreciate that.
(Even though I disagree with him abput Hoagland, I'm
*allowed* to disagree with him without him making a third
world war with me over it.
Re:If it's bad art, it's Poopeye
Reply #8 on: July 27, 2004, 06:11:51 pm
Popeye! I should have known that since everyone was talking
about you in a derogatory fashion, you must have had
something worth saying. I have never bothered to read a
post this lengthy on this board until now. It was a best
seller. I couldn't put it down. I was not a part of this
feud. I am a newbie. I have heard the story before, from
the perspective of some of the victims. Now you have
further confirmed the truth of the stories that I have
heard. I do not know you, but I wish that I did. You are
not alone.
Re:If it's bad art, it's Poopeye
Reply #11 on: July 27, 2004, 07:01:08 pm
Funny, I was wondering the same thing about you guys. And I
have seen no evidence that his perspective is fundamentally
flawed. Your supposed stonewalling of the truth throws very
little weight with the victims of your malevolent cabal. We
got your number.
Re:If it's bad art, it's Poopeye
Reply #12 on: July 27, 2004, 07:11:47 pm
Here here!!!!! :)
Re:If it's bad art, it's Poopeye
Reply #13 on: July 27, 2004, 07:17:32 pm



Wherein Popeye puts the F U back in Fun!     Again.
Please hark back with Me to the year 2003.
Spring was in the air.
I was waxing eloquent all over the place, as usual.
Bitch Slaps were flying like Monkeys out of Mikey's ASS.
Banana's were ripe on the vine.

Good Times, Good Times.

Let Me share with all you all a forum post from those wee daze from which My recent reminders about having given people so-called "fair warning", time and again, had sprung forth and from which they have their origin, or thereabouts.

With appropriate admonitions and educational philosophizings and instructional teachings and the like. Oh, yes.... I tried My darndest and hardest and such to give people all the toolz and associated resources they needed to make the required and desired changes to themselves and their so-called lives so that they wouldn't have to BE taught Right from wrong by li'l ol' Me. (okay, okay.... and a few select others, now and then)

And have heapin', helpin' ladles full of thine own "medicine" shoved down thy deepened throats without so much as a teaspoon of sugar to help that nasty ol' medicine go down.

Yep. I doone did My part, and then some, but all you all Failed with a capital 'F', yet again. Quite miserably, in fact. C'est la vie d'guerre, n'est paz?

To wit:

     (with apropos 'corrections', emphases, &tc.)

Popeye puts the _F _ U_ back in Fun!
Regards: I hope he brings his Cheese Monkey -- Popeye
Muttered by The God of Skinny Punks ®
Thu, Apr 24, 2003, 18:18:28
Come, My Children!
My over-18 lovelys. My wanna BE's and never were's. My lessers and lessors. My wish-you-were-more-like-Me's. My want-to-BE-more-like-Me's.
Gather round and close. Harken unto My whispers. The Truth is at your grasp. I will unveil all to you. Priceless gifts at no extra charge. Lay to and receive.
With Me, you may allay your adultish attempts and seek the child within for a time. Rest and calm. And I shall guide you toward maturity that BEfits your advanced age. It is only then that you may achieve the adult status that you so strongly desire.
For an adult who acts as a child in manner and degree is merely acting out against oneself in hurt and pain. And, in turn, against others. For we only hurt others to first and foremost hurt ourselves in acts of self-destuctive BEhavior.
Though you may BE roadkill with unmerited attitude at this juncture, it is within you to realize the potential that resides in us all. To BE an accomplished human BEing in every good aspect of manner and description and self.
This I shall teach you, as you shall learn.
Shall we BEgin....?

Ring a bell?

I didn't think so. Why should now BE any different than then?

Some people are apparently more than a bit too dense and stoopid and ASSinine and Idiotic &tc. to know better or learn from their mistakes or choose to better themselves and all the rest. I guess some people really are UNteachABLE.<

Oh, well. Them's the breaks.

Life's a Bitch and then you live.

More or less.


Add End 'im

Wherein Popeye *laffz* an' *laffz* an' *laffz*....

And now, for the Fax....

"Fellini" came back.

"This" is ALL about "Fellini".

If it tweren't fer Joanne, I would BE livin' in gaol havin' BEen suckered outta My traylor by the ChiCo poLice steada livin' in SIN wit Stevie-O.

"This" is ALL about "Fellini".

"Fellini" doo not care weather peeple or sheeple or li'l ol' Me findz out who him iz or not BE on the interwebnet or IRL or in fantasyLand witch iz why he BEen hidin' 'n' slidin' from eberyWun fer yearz 'n' yearz 'n' dreadin' (not) de ineviTable DISclothesYer (azin the "emperor" (penguin) ain't warein' no close) and THEN we gotz the NEVERending DISinfotainment 'n' skewin' 'n' spin Dr.in' 'n' vain attemptz @ damAge CONtroll and-lookee- ober-dere- not- ober-heah, "Niggah, Pleaze!!!".

Really. and Truly. and BElieve you Me. and I am not whom I say I am not don'tcha-NO nuttin' atoll.

Did all you all know — "This" is ALL about "Fellini".

Hay, "Fellini" — tuched any munkees lately?

Bitter Boy Rooky almost foolz hizzelf inta BElievin' what s/he NOW sez. — SO sad. so sad....

I am a puppetMaster with My own hand up My own arse. Tweedle dumb, tweedle D.

I am Robert Stephens' GOD! Bobby KNEEls and preys to the One True God — li'l ol' Me and Mine. Bobby is on the Atkins DIEt — Hi proTeen, ya see? In more weighs than Wun. Bobby gits hiz Hi-Octane Fewl direct from the spigot. That's why most know him by hiz real nickname — Spigot Breath. And now you know the rest of the story. And don't it ALL make sense now. Finally.

"Fellini" is feyMoose dontchaknow — jesst aks him yerownself — Heel tell ya — hope too kizz a Duck!

I am Mikey's Bit'h. I am "Fellini's" Bit'h. I am the Bitchz Bit'h. I am so-called SoCal MickeyX's Bit'h. I bitch 'bout BEin' SO many peeple's bit'h. Dat's watt dis iz all rilly all aboot.

btw — "This" is ALL about "Fellini".

No, seriously.

More or less.

p.s. Ya doone figgered out howta interwebnet search fer "...." yet???

Addy End 'Em


Quit sending Me all this laughAble enJOYment conTent!!

I BE side-splittin' and gut-bustin' and ASS-waggin' all over the place!!! (and that is none too pretty a site, BElieve you Me, as we all well-know)

Two-bit Media Whores
The Commons
Everyman's BELL/OATES/RAMS Feud Forever (Moderators: Disinfotainment, )
Why the fuck?
on: August 05, 2004, 09:04:25 PM
Why did you change yer name from Olanie to Tiffany? Why choose such a fag name? Are you admitting you are a fag?
Is it the 2 bit fag acting part?
Why did you lie about the gun permit?
Why did you lie about the 7 BMWs?
Why did you lie about your wife Joannie Wong being a Dr?
Why did you lie about being rich when you lived in a 1 bedroom rental?
Whats wrong with you?
Why attack a kid and single mother?
Does Sam Wong know?
TMW Administrator
Reply #1 on: August 05, 2004, 09:45:41 PM
Did I change my name as a representation of some newfound faggotry? You bet, Sailor!
Why did I lie about the gun permit? A girl's gotta protect himself with a fag name like Tiffany, doesn't she?
Why did I lie about the 7 BMWs? I must admit this one was rather evil on my part as it was done purely to give you something to do. No thanks needed.
Why did I lie about my wife Joannie Wong being a Dr? I never lied about my wife Joannie Wong being a Dr. But that might require actually knowing me -- uh, I mean, I'm sure I said "witchdoctor".
Why did you lie about being rich when you lived in a 1 bedroom rental? I think you're a little too invested in me, friend.
Whats wrong with me? What's wrong with YOU, "IHavetaknow"?
Attack a kid and a single mother ... the lunacy never ends.
Sam Wong ... hehe ... Sure!
TMW Grand SheWolfe
Reply #2 on: August 06, 2004, 12:03:06 AM

[( for the record, the search engines, AND those who should know — the following was written by Robert Stephens, a.k.a. Robert a.m. Stephens, RAMS, et al. — and it is NOT novel, exceptional, uncommon, abnormal, uncharacteristic, untypical, and/or unusual — for him — oh, and he's not kidding or joking — seriously — he actually means it.... well, as much as someone like him can mean anything — feel the love! – editors — p.s. see "Hall of Shame" below)]

You have ta know that I'd love to blow your fucking shit for brains head off with a sawed off 12 gauge, motherfucker. Fuck off and kiss my ass shit wipe. I hate you and you're a new age wannabe Art Bell fucking shit licker.
Fuck off asshole.
I am love.
Jr. Mintz
TMW Wabbit
Reply #3 on: August 06, 2004, 06:21:45 AM
kiss my ass mother fucker !

Is it jesst Me, or is "Fellini's" "quiet desperation" screamin' so loud it's a'hurtin' My earz? Me thinks him'in's dothin' protestin' too mucho. Kin ya smell the fear factor??   Oy!   Git that boy-OLD "man" summa DEoderAnt!!
(and hiz little dog wife, too! — 'specially if she's gonna 'love-you-long-time-five-dollah'!!!)

Poor, poor "Fellini". He's BEen BITCH-slapped SO far off hiz game, he don't know if he's cummin' or shittin' or pissin' or both. It's almost kinda sad to see. Ain't it???

And, did anyone else notice that "Fellini" is finally trying so-so hard to reply to things in the way I've been trying to teach him and the rest for years now? None of that pathetic in-line quoting with point-by-point replies for each corresponding point. He's still not quite there yet — baby steps — butt I gotta give credit where credit's due, as I always doo. Keep a'workin' at it li'l cowPoker. You'll get there some day. (or mebbe Fellini's jesst so far off hiz game.... wellugh, jesst reRead the above paireegrafs, "Niggah, Pleaze")

know I shouldn't really BE enJOYin' all this SO mucho, butt you jesst gots to let Me have a little funnin' when I get the oh-so-rare OpperToonIty, ya know?

Okay.... so "multiple timez daily" ain't none so rare, butt you gotta throw Me a bone every now and then, don't ya?


p.s. I got some REAL good crap about Robert Stephens (rams) a'comin' out soon. And there's more than that, too. Stay tooned. Perhaps I have NOT yet begun to Bitch-Slap. So to speak. More or less. Ya think?
I swear! If peeple don't quit eggin' Me on, I'm jesst gonna have'ta keep makin' them vegan toefoo scrambled eggs and veggie bayCon with sour-faced DOH! toasty. Mmmm, Mmmm, Good heavens ta BetSee! I'll take two helpin's, and May I have some more, pleaze? Good shit, Maynard!

Am I bad?

Summa Body Stop Me BEfore I Gleep!

Since po', po' "Fellini'z" off hiz feed, and all stopped up BEyond comprehension and descriptionary proze (that would end up BEing filed under the category of MUCH more information than we Need To Know, anywayz), and to the point of near-sited cross-eyed vizual lisp-ation, and unable to achieve even hiz limited levelz of minimal expression, I thought it waz only Right that I (yes, li'l ol' Me) help him out in a pinch and attempt to express hiz most inner thoughts and feelingz for him, in this, hiz thyme of need.

Agreed, My most-eloquent verbally written elocution will BE completely lost on him and hiz, butt that iz neither here nor there and definitely infinitely not our problem. There'z no reazon why we should lower our intellectual and spiritual and emotional loftiness to their subDEbasement levelz. They wouldn't appreciate it even if we did, severely ingratitudinally challenged individualz that they are. And so, for My goodest bestest bud, legend-wannaBE and pseudo-nemesis-du-jour, this....

Oh, but that I could
         be bound in a nutshell
   and count myself king
       of infinite space —
           were it not that
  I have bad dreams....

Yeah.... I think that'll doo it jesst fine and dandy. No need to thank Me. Carry on. And good luck with that while you're at it.

p.s. btw — I did have a think that mebbe, jesst mebbe, "Fellini's" 'Xaggerations' are more like Robert Stephens' in nature, and jesst mebbe "Fellini" is also a pathoILLogical liar in stead of a simpleTon 'game player'. Way too mucho Truth potentiality in that scenario, ain't there? Prolly way more Truth and REALity than sheeple would like to CONsider. Xplains a lot, as well. It tendz to BE kinda sumthin' of a "little man" trait(or), don'tcha'know? What-ev-er. Six of One, A Half Baker's Dozen of Another. S.S.D.D. (Same Shit, Different Day)   Dancin' Banana Danse of Joy

I am mucho more of a Navy Seal than ramsy ever could BE


Yet another laff riot entrained by Robert Stephens. I guess that's about all s/he iz good for. Ever haz BEen good for. Can you imagine the daily hilarity s/he provided hiz class mates in skool from kiddiegarden on up to whatever grade it waz that s/he either quit skool or got kicked out permanently. (ever wonder why s/he'z never posted an image of hiz High Skool Diploma?) Poor guys/he MUST haz BEen laffed at all the time. Prolly partly the reazon why s/he iz who and what s/he iz today.

Anyway, I'm reposting the above link CONtent here so that everyWun haz a good hiztory record of what we have all come to unfortunately know az Spigot Breath ramsy. And you gotta love the way this Fake Navy Seal Outter guy writes — kinda remindz Me of.... oh, I don't know.... Me?   Dancin' Banana Danse of Joy

Phony SEAL Hall of Shame

Last Known Location: St. Ignatius, MT

NARR: Robert A.M. Stephens laid claim to being a SEAL Reservist attached to SEAL Team THREE, a NASA Space Shuttle contractor and a government "BlackOps insider" with information on everything from UFO cow lip research to DoD Kaptain Krunch decoder rings. He foisted his nonsense to hundreds of thousands of listeners on the Art Bell radio program until we hoisted him up by his skivvies on the yardarm.

UPDATE: Stephens was apparently so upset over his exposure as a phony SEAL that he has regressed into spasms of unintelligible drivel between bouts of near-vegetative drooling and uncontrollable twitching. Well, at least he is no longer claiming to have been a SEAL. NASA has also publicy stated that Stephens has never been affiliated with them in any regard (i.e. his entire "life" is a lie).

It seems he is/was also involved in some sort of litigation with Art Bell as a result of being exposed worldwide as a complete fraud in every aspect (SEALs, NASA etc. etc. etc...) Clearly Stephens is highly agitated about having his lies revealed. But, that's what we do here to phony SEALs like Mr. Wannabe. As for Art Bell, well, no one around here can recall ever hearing his radio show.

Quite frankly, we don't really care about any UFO debates. Stephens claimed to be a former Navy SEAL and it is for that lie alone that we keel-hauled him in the sea of exposure. RUMINT has it that Stephens privately continues to maintain his SEAL fraud to some degree, no doubt claiming that his exposure was part of some government conspiracy to silence him. He has clearly built himself up as a legend in his own, deluded mind. And as for that forged death certificate...too bad it was also fake. Get a life, Stephens.

If you would like to let this premium loser know what a specimen he is, contact him at the following locale:

Robert A.M. Stephens
34171 Hwy. 93
St. Ignatius, MT 59865

Burn, Baby, Burn

Sorry to DISappoint — How ever, I am not anywheres near stoopid enuf to build on a flood plane, or anywheres else that I couldn't pretty mucho relatively absolutely control the safety of Me and Mine and Our 'possessions'.


Better luck next time. Dancin' Banana Danse of Joy

Ne'er the Twain Shall Meet

btw — Summa all ya all might'a noticed dat I was in absentia a while back. Fer a short period. Wellugh, I was on My annual mid-summer nightz dream journey to Hell and back ag'in, or thereaboutz, thru Devil'z CANyonz, no less — now THERE'z a maw! And I don't mean MAW. When 'they' say the Middle Fork iz Wilderness, 'they' mean it with a capital 'W'. Count on it.

UNlike summa people, who shall REmain nameLess (punz inTendEd), I don't use no dredge or other MeChanical POWered e-Quipment. That's fer sissy-boyz and girly-men and the like. If g0d doone meant men to uze dredgez, he wouldn't'a made panz and handz and such. (o' course, they ain't allowed where I go, anywayz) I packs it ALL in, and I packs it ALL back out. Every - single - little - ounce.... and then $um. Count on it.

I gotz da Fever! Yeah, Baby!! Count on it!!!

An' BEfore too long, why, I doo BElieve I shall BE makin' a nother sim'lar journey. So, if'n ya gotz da gotz [sicK], cum on in.... da water'z fine 'n' dandy. And if'n ya jesst happens ta cum aCross a sirTan camp while yer thereaboutz, why, jesst, "Hullo, the Camp!", and AFTER yer acKNOWledged, step right fourth and DEclare yerSelf, and make da inquiry ya know ya wantz ta make, aksin', "Popeye?", and, az I put My hand on My hip pistola and size ya up, if I deem ya worthy, or thereaboutz, why, I doo BElieve ya'all shall see da biggest shit-eatin' grin ya ever doone seen, and right along wit dat, an INvitation ta da best cuppa coffee dis side o' da Ozarkz an' da tastiest country-fried vegan breakfast- lunch- dinner ya ever did eat, cooked on a camp fire, or elsewherez. Count on it.

See ya. Wouldn't wanna BE ya. Count on it. Dancin' Banana Danse of Joy

When You Change the Way You Look at Things — All The Things You Look at Change — as Do You

Let's all try that today, if only for a brief moment, and see what happens.

Ecce! Homonculus Dei!
No Where Man


Decorate Me with Henna!
 (and call it Tatooine)

Wherein Popeye makes "Jessini" whimper and cower. Again. Still. Always. On and on and on.... The usual.

Meanwhile, over on The Mediocre Whores bored, which is where, when 'they' want to give the Universe an acid enema, 'they' insert the tube, nothing mucho at all is happening. As usual.


And I even changed the way I look at things, more or less, and all of the things I look at changed, as well, as did I. More or less. So to speak.

And wouldn't you freaking know it — I simply (or complexly) BEcame even more resolute in My current wayz of thinking and actions and all. After all, when You're Right, You're Right.   Right?

In fact, I think I need to step things up a bit.

No, seriously.

What exactly dooes that mean?

Wellugh, if I told you that, it would BE telling, now, wouldn't it?

And spoil the surprise(s).

So, I suppose all you all will jesst have to stay tooned.

   (you knew you were going to anywayz — *laffz*)

p.s. and btw and FYI:   It haz recently cum to My attention, having BEen brought to My attention, that it seems that a select few have begun referring to li'l ol' Me as "The Destroyer of People'z Worldz".

If I am not mistaken, and I rarely am, not only doo I not, necessarily, take kindly to that.... designation.... whether it BE apropos, or not, I would suggest that its use BE applied more towards the "positive", if you know what I mean, if you doo not mind. If it must BE used at all.

Jesst a 'friendly' suggestion, you understand.

We thank you ag'in fer yer support. Dancin' Banana Danse of Joy

And don't think I don't know about or have forgotten whomever it was who has been dropping 30 silver indian head giver dimez on li'l ol' Me re: My Gold Fever et al. — anyone think I don't have a very long memory regards such things?


Bring It On

Wherein Popeye takes a moment to celebrate our Olympic atheletes and their magnificent accomplishments. As well as the ideals of humanity at large.
But The ScudSuckers keep on keepin' on. As usual. Cuz that's all they know how to doo.
btw — Wasn't that a movie? With cute little girlies and Eliza Dushku. She's a sweet little thang. Not dooing too bad in "Tru Calling." Put on a little weight, which I, and she, can doo without. I remember the first time I saw her in some movie where the parents were divorced. She was pretty young then, a teenager of sorts, and pudgy with baby fat. I knew then that she was a shining star in the making, and said so. Later, when she grew up some, she got überTasty. And has stayed so off and on ever since. But I digress.
Bring it on??? Where have you BEen you ignorant spitIdiot??
Aaaaaaaahahahahahahahahahahahaha.... Dancin' Banana Danse of Joy
.... Someone (who must remain nameless) made an inquiry as to what techniques I employ to prevent Myself from strangling the holy living shit out of people who obviously deserve it, and then some. Here's one that seems to work quite well:  

Self-Help, the Popeye Way

Sometimes, when I really feel the urge to kill someone (which is somewhat rare), I do a little trick to calm myself down. I'll go over to the person's house and ring the doorbell. When the person comes to the door, I'm gone, but you know what I've left on the porch? A flaming jack–o–lantern with a big, rusty butcher's knife stuck in the side of it's head, with a note that simply says "You." After that, I usually feel a lot better, and no harm done.


The Truth Hurtz

Wherein Popeye proves the age-old theory that "The Truth Hurtz". (actually, I proved that a long time ago, I just wanted an excuse (az if I needz one) to BitchSlap you-know-whom until they whimpered and cried. And so I did. And so they did. As well they should. Coz that's gotta hurt worse than a G.E.D. Paper Cut ©. Jesst aks them. They'll tell ya. Coz you know how much into The Truth they iz. *wink* *wink*) Yep. As everyone well-knows, I likes to serve up My Humor with a big ol' platter of BitchSlap. (sauce on the side, pleaze) Yes-sir-ee, Bob!
Man, Oh, Man!! Sometimez I really crack Me up!!!
And now.... The Danse of Joy! Dancin' Banana Danse of Joy
btw — someone forwarded Me a few of RockStansky's latest garbled anus-vomitory posts from over on The Mediodre Whore's bored and I was severely UNimpressed. Talk about a waste of a few moments that I'll never get back. I had always hoped he would learn a thing or two over the years. I mean, come on! I was only asking for a couple of easy any-things, not study to join Mensa, fer Krist's saki!! And he couldn't even musTard that. [sicK] How sad. I guess it's one of those, "You can lead a horse's ASS to agua-dulce, but you can't make it cleanse the muddy, bloody shit off of it's most-used verbal orifice," kind of things. And that really sucks. What can you expect, I suppose, when you throw Pearls of Wisdom at the Feats of sWinos. No offense, or anything, but what can you say about someone who's life is technically not worth insuring? Unfortunately, the BEst we can hope for now is that, with diligence, RockStansky might make Village Idiot. MayBE. Given enough time. He has good role models now, that's for sure. Butt he also has a lot of competition, as well. And even an Xtreme Loser can lose the simple-minded-est contests when surrounded by others of his ILLk. IrRegardless, Clint Williams is no more. Much like a dead parrot, I'm sure. Requiescat in Pace, Li'l CowPoker. That's the most we can hope for at this late date. *sniff* *sniff* I am Verklempt....
p.s. This is how utterly and completely freakin' ASS Stupid you motherfvckers are:
Crafty has BEen posting on your bored.
So, why didn't you bring up the point that, I have not said anything about Crafty, BUT, for reasons of chosen association to all you all, and posting on your bored, I called (almost) every other female who was posting over there (and a few males) "Cvnts"?
Boy!   That sure would'a BEen a "good one" on Me, now, wouldn't it??
(and I even gave you plenty o' time to doo it, too)
Yeah.   You guyz are the ultimate braintrust, who are SO good at "what you doo," and SO much better at anything and everything than Me, and you are not My Bitchz, I am your Bitch.
Keep rePeating that mantra (boytra) to yourselves over and over and over until you actually start to BElieve it and don't forget to tell other Idiotz the same so they will start to BElieve it, too. (fyi: you only have to tell RockStansky once — wouldn't want you to overburdenly hurt yourselves none)
Queue Eee Fvcking Dee, Bitch! Dancin' Banana Danse of Joy
Je-sus Fuck-ing Christ!
Gawd-Dammit I hate having to write for a sixth grade reading level! (or lower)
It has been brought to My attention that some (most/all) of the Idiotz over on The Mediocre Whores bored were not able to sufficiently process, understand and comprehend the above ditty. i.e., the one that begins: p.s. This is how utterly and completely freakin' ASS Stupid you motherfvckers are:
And so, I shall endeavor to explain their grievous stupidity and ignorance and idiocy to them (and others?), line by line, point by point, I suppose, if I have to. And apparently I doo.
Butt this is the last fvcking time! After this, you're on your own. Go take a college-level english and reading comprehension class BEyond English 101, or, more likely, Remedial English! And reach down deep into your grinch-flavored piggy banks and pay for a tutor. It's money well-spent. (or, in your cases, more likely wasted)
Now, follow along closely. Pay attention. I'll type slowly so you can keep up. Oops! Hurry along, I can't type any slower than this.
          To wit:   THINK!  
p.s. This is how utterly and completely freakin' ASS Stupid you motherfvckers are:
          [[ THINK!   I doo not know if you can fully comprehend the above statement, or not. There is probably some PSYCHOillogical blocking taking place on your part. It seems that statements of Truth have that affect on you. So read it over a few more times and then try to catch up. ]]
Crafty has BEen posting on your bored.
          [[ THINK!   Doo you have a problem with the above statement? Surely you can't BE THAT stupid, ignorant and unaware.... can you??? If so, then you are BEyond hope and help. ]]
So, why didn't you bring up the point that,
----->>>>>   I have not said anything about Crafty,
              [[ THINK!   Posting over there — paaaayyy aaa-tennn-tionnnnn ]]
BUT,       [[ THINK!   Doo I have to make this line blink? ]]
for reasons of
      1) chosen association to all you all,
      2) posting on your bored,
I called (almost) every other female who was posting over there (and a few males) "Cvnts"?   [[ THINK!   i.e.: I called all you all "Cvnts" for the two (2) reasons stated above the above, BUT, did not so designate Crafty ]]
          [[ THINK!   Doo you get it now? Sorry. I Can't make it much more clearer than that. (nobody could) It's simple english. Agreed, with "complexly" constructed compound sentences, etc. Again: A mind is a terrible thing to waste. So get out of the toilet, or sewer, or where ever you are at these daze and at least make an attempt at BEing a non-worthless individual. ]]
          [[ THINK!   An interogatory exclamation (question) implied to be interpreted as "So, why didn't you???" — Now go back and REread the section above this "section". And pay attention this time. There will BE a short quiz afterward. ]]
Boy!   That sure would'a BEen a "good one" on Me, now, wouldn't it??
(and I even gave you plenty o' time to doo it, too)
          [[ THINK!   Obviously (supposedly), you missed the perfect chance to "call Me" (as you are wont to doo) on this.... as — "hypocrisy"? – disparate treatment? (oh, go look it up in the dictionary, you lazy ASS) – "favoritism"? – et al. – what-ev-er! — Am I going too fast for you? ]]
Yeah.   You guyz are the ultimate braintrust, who are SO good at "what you doo," and SO much better at anything and everything than Me, and you are not My Bitchz, I am your Bitch.
Keep rePeating that mantra (boytra) to yourselves over and over and over until you actually start to BElieve it and don't forget to tell other Idiotz the same so they will start to BElieve it, too. (fyi: you only have to tell RockStansky once — wouldn't want you to overburdenly hurt yourselves none)
          [[ THINK!   If you don't get the above paragraph then go fvck yourself on and with a pogo stick along with Dick Cheney and hiz Puppet-pResident sideShow. ]]
Queue Eee Fvcking Dee, Bitch! Dancin' Banana Danse of Joy
          [[ THINK!   Q.E.D. — Quod Erat Demonstrandum — "that which was to BE demonStrated, HAS BEen demonStrated" — in other wordz, I Win! Again. As usual. And, yes, you bunch ARE, obviously and definitely, the most utterly and completely freakin' ASS Stupid, Idiotic, Ignorant, UNder-educated, Clueless, Worthless, and Post-Hole Dumb Loser motherfvckers I have ever had the great displeasure of knowing exist on this planet! Can I get an "Amen?" (I knew I could) ]] Dancin' Banana Danse of Joy
p.s. Sorry. I didn't mean to make anyone Cry. But let us not forget that "this" is not Revenge — it is Punishment. It's supposed to BE UNcomfortable.
p.p.s. "Am I Bad?"



Wherein Popeye continues His Legacy. One of many legacies, actually. And a fine legacy it is, too. Something to BE proud of. Nothing to hide. Come one, come all. I am nothing if not an Open Book.
Ecce Veritates!
The Mikey WereLitzers, on the other hand, of The Mediocre Whores bored (TMW - disinfotainment.com), et al., have a "legacy" that is something to not BE proud of. And that is quite the UNderStatement, to tell the Truth.
Their legacy is something to BE ashamed of. Something to hide, and hide away from. Something they now would like to "go away". Even if they have to perform REvisionist History to achieve that goal. Something they hope their co-workers, and acquaintances, and friends, and neighbors, and family doo not find out about. (few that they have)
A worrisome, nagging, nasty, ugly, thing that eats away at their battered consciences, and questionable minds, and sickly bodies, and sorrowful souls. Like a puss-filled, putrid, festering, gangrenous, suppurating, weeping wound-sore that is BEcoming more and more visible (and smelly) as each day passes.
Some people can see that extreme ugliness even now when they walk by them on the street, or in the mall. etc... You don't have to meet them, or talk to them, much less get to know them, BEfore you intuitively know that they are not someone you want to know. And are, in Fact, someone you should not get to know. Someone to stay away from, and not associate with, and shun and ignore.
That is their legacy.
For all the world to see.

O Alexander, I wish to show you the greatest secret of secrets; may the Divine Power help you to conceal the mystery and to accomplish your aim. Take therefore the stone which is not a stone and is in every human being and in every place and at every time, and it is called the Egg of the Philosophers, and Terminus of the Egg.


North and South

Wherein Popeye graphically illustrates His version of Self-Help, which is textually described above.
Meanwhile, a scientific principalis is proven by the actions of its constituent descriptors. That being that, like some odd form of human interaction-based anti-magnetism quandry pseudo-physics,
Losers attract Losers.
Although an inexact science, at best, anecdotal evidentiary-extremus of the Negative-Negative Attraction Principal, when applied according to the First Law of StupiDynamics, that is, that "Stupid is as Stupid Does", especially as applied to human-human interaction, is SO profound as to make one's eyeballs bulge. And then some.
The Systemic Corollaries also apply, of course, such that,

Idiots attract Idiots,
ASSholes attract ASSholes,
Dullards attract Dullards,
Scumbags attract Scumbags,
Lowlifes attract Lowlifes,
Menials attract Menials,
Liars attract Liars,
Frauds attract Frauds,
Has BEens, Wanna BE's, Never Were's,
      and Never-Will-BE's
   Has BEens, Wanna BE's, Never Were's,
      and Never-Will-BE's
BoBasTard Putzez attract BoBasTard Putzez,
ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad stupefaciens....
(Note that these principals have been handed down as wisdom throughout the ages, in varying manners and degrees, through various forms of folk sayings, such as, for example, "Birds of a feather flock together", "You are known by the company you keep", et cetera....)
As merely one recent perfect example, I suggest the following anecdotal humockrity:
It seems that some unfortunate sod at The Mediocre Whores bored (TMW @ disinfotainment.com) going under the nickname of AlienRadioStatic (?) entered this web page for inclusion into running for the little-known and highly-insignificant award of "Awful Link of the Day" (for Thursday, September 2, 2004).
And We won!
This grande pronouncement being meted out to the lucky webmaster (?) via the ostentatious wannaBE website denoted as SomethingAwful dotcom. (no, I had never heard of it either)
If you are able to slog through the extremely poor "writing", here is the questionable text in question that was spewed that fateful day: (by a stand-in webmaster, I BElieve, so therein might BE part of the "problem" — please try to not laugh too hard at him/them as you read this, if you doo — pity is a much more appropriate response)

Awful Link of the Day
The P-T-B Archival Recap of a New Era (thanks AlienRadioStatic) - Okay there are a lot of fucking words on this site and to tell you the truth, I only read about seven of them, six of which I've already forgotten. This computer screen page is something about some guy who's all pissed off at another computer screen page site and he's devoted his entire life to writing about how much he hates them and wants to post little nerd geek shit pictures regarding them. I don't know what this guy's problem is, besides the fact that he's got some mental disease which makes him a huge dumbass, but there's about 60,000 paragraphs of shit he wrote that you can read and use to analyze why he's such a raving fuckpot with too much damn spare time on his hands.
[ stolen copyrighted image inserted here by them --
here is a link to the actual full-size image ]

[ text quote from this site: ]
Wherein Popeye continues His Legacy. One of many legacies, actually. And a fine legacy it is, too. Something to BE proud of. Nothing to hide. Come one, come all. I am nothing if not an Open Book. Behold! Ecce Veritates! The Mikey WereLitzers, on the other hand, of The Mediocre Whores bored (TMW - disinfotainment.com), et al., have a "legacy" that is something to not BE proud of. And that is quite the UNderStatement, to tell the Truth. Their legacy is something to BE ashamed of. Something to hide, and hide away from. Something they now would like to "go away". Even if they have to perform REvisionist History to achieve that goal. Something they hope their co-workers, and acquaintances, and friends, and neighbors, and family doo not find out about. (few that they have) A worrisome, nagging, nasty, ugly, thing that eats away at their battered consciences, and questionable minds, and sickly bodies, and sorrowful souls. Like a puss-filled, putrid, festering, gangrenous, suppurating, weeping wound-sore that is BEcoming more and more visible (and smelly) as each day passes. Some people can see that extreme ugliness even now when they walk by them on the street, or in the mall. etc... You don't have to meet them, or talk to them, much less get to know them, BEfore you intuitively know that they are not someone you want to know. And are, in Fact, someone you should not get to know. Someone to stay away from, and not associate with, and shun and ignore. That is their legacy. For all the world to see.
Yeah, sure buddy, I'm glad you spend your time writing all this stupid shit nobody will ever read for your site nobody will ever visit. I bet you're just pleased as punch about spending all your free time obsessing over a bunch of people you'll never meet and explaining in painful detail just how much you want to bitch about them on your Intersite webscreen. Christ, it's bad enough when people have to write shit on the computer screen, but it's even worse when some loser dickslobs spend time writing shit about other people writing shit. How big of a limpwristed bitchtit loser does that make you?

Anyway, what can you say about a "writer" who uses terms and phrases such as "computer screen page" and "Intersite webscreen". (QUIT laughing so hard!) And then ends his "comments" with "Christ, it's bad enough when people have to write shit on the computer screen, but it's even worse when some loser dickslobs spend time writing shit about other people writing shit. How big of a limpwristed bitchtit loser does that make you?" (emphases mine) I don't know. Apparently he was talking about himself? I guess. What a freaking Idiot. (seriously, it's really not polite to laugh at people like that — even when they refer to themselves as "limpwristed bitchtit losers")
There are also apparently too many words on this webpage for the "writer", as well. (is anyone really surprised?) I guess there aren't enough pictures for his small brain and tiny mind to grasp, although he apparently doesn't have the intelligence gawd gave a burnt peanut and is unable to appreciate those images that are here for what they are. However, I think we all know he didn't even try. That wasn't the point of his little "tirade". Like most people, he just plain dooes not give a flying fvck. And he is proud of that fact, rather than ashamed, as th/he/y should BE.
The problem is, when you are dealing with this level of stupidity, it BEcomes difficult for a normal-intelligence level person, much less a higher-level intelligence person, to comprehend a situation like this. The higher mind naturally wants to rebel against such Idiocy and Ignorance. So one finds oneself having to force oneself to lower themselves to a level where they can come to grips with such drivel and crap and make an attempt to understand the situation. However, once one accomplishes such a Herculean feat, it quickly BEcomes obvious that one of the main reasons the world is in the state it is in is BEcause of people like this, who write these types of things, who engage in these types of BEhaviors, and so on.
It then BEcomes understandable how someone such as the "writer" above could so easily misread this website/webpage and completely miss the point. (is anyone really surprised?) That this page, in particular, is obviously (to some) not for the world at large, but for a small, specific group of interested individuals. That is its audience. And anyone else who might BE interested is welcome to BEcome educated and made aware, as well. And have more than a few laughs along the way. (warning: you doo need to have at least a modicum of a sense of humor prior to attempting to "get" the extreme jocularity present)
And then, The Second Law of StupiDynamics, Affectation of Sinergy, comes into play, as well. Through the process of StupiDynamics, some of the posters on the forums at the aforementioned website came over to post on The Mediocre Whores bored, where they fit right in as if they had BEen there all along. No one was surprised about that, I'm sure. S.S.D.D.
So now it is all very clear, is it not?   (Idiots doo not even bother trying)
And I am now even more well-known and famous than I was BEfore. Well, a little, anyway. BEcause the aforementioned website is insignificant at best, My hit counter barely moved with the additional traffic. I get mucho more hits when I post some good info about Midj, Jessini, cramsy, et al., and/or make a funny about them. But, every little bit counts I suppose. What-ev-er.
p.s. So sorry for using so many (*gasp*) words above — I hope you didn't hurt yourself. And I'll try to BE more "obssessive" to the point some of you would like and fantasize about and dedicate all of My daily hours to this "venture" and respond quicker than a snail can blink its eyes next time. Until then, please hold your breath. We thank you again for your support.


Jerkin' the Gherkin

Wherein Popeye humorostifies the tragicomical so-called lifeLess of Jessini with points of 'interest', Truth and Reality. (hey! — at least I intentionally Right "this way"....) I know it's not actually (in the rilly and truely sense) oh-so funny what a sad sac-o-shite Jessini truly is, and that I am his Sarge and command her in chef [sicK], and s/he is My private pee-on nth classLess whom I make peel po-tot-toes at My ever-lovin' whim and fancy with a kick in the arse to make him feel right at homeLess. But that dooes not mean we can't have a belly-side-splitter at his cheap expense. Now, doo it?
Is it just Me, or is it funny in here??

Wellugh, I didn't get any Mein Kampf visitorini's during this latest foray into the wilds of the northWestern wilderness territories where the river runs through it. Your loss, not Mein. Of course, I'm quite sure you are more than used to that by now. Oh, well — mebbe next season. If you're still a Round, and kicking, that is.
As fer Me, I got a nice dusting of shiny old yeller, and more than a few mini-MacNuggets, and a few largesse that will make nice Rings 'n' Things. And some nice rock snapples. And a fair amount of target practice all around. "They" doo not call Me Annie Oakley cuz it sounds funny, ya know.
Lately I BEen thinkin' that I might make a move on down toward Florida way fer a spell and try My luck at Treasure Huntin'. 'Specially now that the storms have whipped things up a bit. How Atrocha'yes would that BE if I stumbled on some Pirate Booty while skinny dipping in the Carrib? Arrrr???
After all, a boat is a boat and a horse is hoarse, and ne'er the twain shall mete if I have any say aboot it. I'd ask Midj Thru-0 about nauticalizing if'n s/he tweren't a know-nuthin' nit-twit aboot such things. Him and RussCussSissy-boy, both. Quick! Point Lee-ward!! .... Ha!!! Gotcha!!!! Ya frawdy bawdy drunkin' skunks!!!!! (they wuz both prolly towel-boyz in the Navy afore they waz (sub-?) gene rally disCharged — and that's in their wet dreamz)
Hel, I gots more salt water in My piss on a rainy New Englander day then either of them two doo have, ever have had, or ever will have, in their railing vomitory day dreamz. Heck, I wouldn't even let them swab My deck if they begged Me. Or clean My poop deck of dredger with a bucket and mop, neither. Yep. Definitely Towel-Boyz. The lot o' them..

Apparently, there are still a few people who seem a might confused.
So this little ditty is for all you all:
One way, or the other, there's gonna BE Justice.
Is them words too big fer ya ta understand, concept-wise and all?

The heart of Man is not compound of lies,
but draws some wisdom from the only Wise,
and still recalls him. Though now long estranged,
Man is not wholly lost nor wholly changed.
Dis-graced he may be, yet is not dethroned,
and keeps the rags of lordship once he owned,
his world-dominion by creative act:
not his to worship the great Artefact,
Man, Sub-creator, the refracted light
through whom is splintered from a single White
to many hues, and endlessly combined
in living shapes that move from mind to mind.
Though all the crannies of the world we filled
with Elves and Goblins, though we dared to build
Gods and their houses out of dark and light,
and sowed the seed of dragons, 'twas our right
(used or misused). The right has not decayed.
We make still by the law in which we're made.

Please doo NOT interrupt Me
while I am talking to MySelf!
We thank you again
for your support.

Words to Think By....
Where have we heard this BEfore,
or some thing very much like it?
"When the character of a man
    is not clear to you,
look at his friends."
            — Japanese Proverb
Oh, Man!
That's gotta sting!
(okay, okay.... for the 'Tardz
"You are known by the company you keep!")
[ the "count on it" is implied.... of course ]

And the following, as well....
"The question is not
who is going to let me;
it is
who is going to stop me."
            — Ayn Rand
A humorous interlude,
screaming WAY too much Truth at
the perceptions and perspectives
of too many people
(who shan't remain nameless)
whose daily lives
mirror the Tragedy
of a seemingly simple jocularity
via metaphoric allegory.
Or thereabouts.
we are not laughing with you,
we are laughing at you)

Homer: Are you saying you're never
going to eat any animal again?
What about bacon?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Ham?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Pork chops?
Lisa: Dad, those all come from the same animal.
Homer: Heh heh heh. Ooh, yeah, right, Lisa.
A wonderful, magical animal....
            — The Simpsons
Excuse Me while we
ponder concepts
BEyond your understanding
and ability to comprehend....
"Do not be too moral.
You may cheat yourself
out of much life.
Aim above morality.
Be not simply good;
be good for something."
            — Henry David Thoreau
(yeah, I know....
that one has its own,
special, little 'snap',
for obvious reasons &mdash *laffz*)

I doo not want your
sphinctered little brains
and tiny little minds
to explode, or implode,
so, one more for the road,
shall we....
"Read, every day,
something no one else is reading.
Think, every day,
something no one else is thinking.
Do, every day,
something no one else
would be silly enough to do.
It is bad for the mind
to continually be part of unanimity."
            — Christopher Morley
Oh, you have
NO idear
how 'difficult' it was
for Me to NOT change all them
do's to doo's and be's to BE's....
et alii....
you will never know....

    Given a long enough timeline,    
    the probability of survival    
    drops to zero.    
    That's right.    
    Look at your watch.    
    Very smart.    
    Relatively speaking, of course.    

    Whomever it is    
    that is spreading    
    "The Rumor"    
    that I highly resemble    
    the actor    
    Alejandro Rey    
    should stop.    
    Not that there is    
    anything wrong with that.    
    I'm "just saying".    
    Is all.    
    We thank you again    
    for your support.    

I doo BElieve what we have here is
A Failure To Communicate
Because, you underStand,
I brought you into this world,
if I have to,
I will take you out.
And I doo BElieve
I doo BElieve,
so I doo BElieve
I shall.
when I come fer ya,
and I will cum for you,
I am coming for you,
when you see the
sparkling dew drop whites
of My
periWinkle baby blue's,
and I am
In Your Face
like the alien in Alien,
I want you to drop down
and give Me 50,
and then curl up tight into
a tiny little ballish ballLess feetAll position,
stick yer nasty thumb
(who knows where it's BEen)
into yer gapin' maw of a pieHole mouth,
suck on it
like it's the best-tastin' cookie-candy
yer Daddy never did give you,
(or gave ya too mucho of on a nightly basis)
all your worthLess lifeLess,
day one   to   Day's End,
and make cutish suckling piggi
wimp-ering soundz of
JOYyes DEsPair.
and hommina, hommina, hommina
grits on a griddle
wit an apple in yer mouth
and down south
or thereabouth
coz you reMind everyOne
of a pear-shaped apple —
rotten to the core,
a small stem,
and full of nasty worms....
butt, I digress....
I shall proSeed to
Talk 'Bout Yo' Mama.
An' tha's jesst to
git yer attention.
Then I doo BElieve I shall
introDouche you to
  The God of Ants  
Up close and personal like.
And then
All will BE Right
in the World.
Or close enuf fer gubMint work.
Oh, Yes.
I doo BElieve
I have an ETA
on a DOA.
And that would BE an
Estimated Time of ASSwhooppin'
on a
kinDull of pissAnts.
Oh, Yeah!
Count on it?
(and now.... The Danse of Joy!)Dancin' Banana Danse of Joy


Psy-cho! Don't nobody make any sudden movements.... bowel, or otherwise....

Wherein Popeye spatulates the stati quo down to their most very common DEMONinator [sicK], with proofs positive and negative of the scientific mathematical sort, which must then BE divided by the eNumerator to calculate and arrive at the correctional answer, which I BElieve is 42. If I'm not mistaken. And I rarely am.
In other news, next up is, and currently showing, which, according to due course and the way things work around here, will actually officially BE discussed in the next installment, a Contest of Contests. It will BE interesting to see if anyone can beat Li'l ol' Me at My own game. So to speak. And, if someone dooes, then good for them. We shall see what we shall see.
Like I said, there won't BE any actual prizes, per se, and I only say, "per se," because I like to say, "per se," but props will BE duely atrophied upon those who deServe them for overAll high score count, longest word, 'coolest word', and anything else that strikes My fancy and makes Me go, "Ooh!", or thereabouts. Which, and I know you were dieing to know, is about how My so-called life goes on a daily basis. Lately, it just seems that one day follows another.
What to doo, what to doo?
You know that ancient proverb?
   (you know, the one that is burned into your skull and
     blistered onto the far reaches of your retinal cortex)

      When Popeye bored
      Stanky things happen
      to 'peoples' who doo
      deServe them and such.
Man! I doo love that saying!! (I think I saw it in a Fortune Cookie once)
Anyway, I am off to start My word list. I figger in a week I should have Me quite the basketfull of words and such. Count on it.
(oh, and btw, and fyi, I plan on winning ALL of them non-prizes)

Quick update: So far I have over 100 words, several 6-letter, an eight and a nine.
No total score. I think I'm going to have to try to write a program to calculate the total score because it will be too hard to do by hand. If I can, I will make it available online so you can submit your lists and get a count to see how you are doing. If you want to "brag", send me an e-mail with your current status as a heads-up and encouragement for others.
And/or, if I can, I'll make a "high score" list that is grabbed and posted when you run your list through the counter program. (you'll have to trust Me that I won't grab your words for My own use — if you aren't capable at this late date of knowing that I am trustworthy and ethical enough to stand by that statement, etc., etc., etc., then fvck you very much and go away yesterday)
I was thinking Javascript, but it might be easier to make in PHP. I'll see what I can do. For "fun" I might check to see if the word is valid and "makeable" from the board. That could get interesting, programming-wise. I could probably also look up each word at dictionary.com, but they probably wouldn't appreciate that.
Scoring update: as one "playa" mentioned to Me, to make it more "fair" for people who can find them big words, I'm modifying the "rulez" to be more like a word game I play that I can't think of the name right now, but they give you extra points for longer words.
So, 2, 3 and 4 letter words get their letter count score (plus tile multipliers — these are always added in for each separate instance, irregardless of the extra points scoring, etc.). And then you go into extra points for 5 or more letter words, as follows:
5 = 6
6 = 8
7 = 10
8 = 15
9 = 20
10 = 30
11+ = 50
So, for example, if you got a 6-letter word using the 'X', it would be 8 + 5 (- 1) = 12. (the minus 1 fixes the multiplier value calculation — a "non-extra" 3-letter word would be calculated as 2 + (1 * 5) = 7, or, 3 + (5 - 1) = 7)

Well, here's something to look at, but not much.
It's self-explanatory.
Oh, and a head's up for those who go psycholy and weirdly acronymic on us: I'm disregarding and throwing out any and all acronyms that people obviously just went out and looked up in some book or webpage, since there are "a million of 'em". If you FIND the odd and obvious A.M.A., or EOT, or S.N.A.F.U., or others like those, then fine. But if you have U.S.B.L.U.F.C. (the United Steamworkers and Bellhops Local Union and Fraternal Club), then you damn-well better have proof that you are actually a member of that organization and/or know someone who is and/or their chapter HQ is right down the street, etc...
You have been fourwarned. ;o)
(perhaps a might too late for a few of you? Sorry 'bout that. *laffz*)

....what incensed Popeye more inwardly was the blatant jokes of the BoTardz, and others, who passed it all off as a jest, laughing immoderately, pretending to understand everything, the why and the wherefore, and in reality not knowing their own tiny minds....

— Denny Crane

Okey, Dokey — The online word checker is now up and working seemingly well.
In case you've forgotten, here's the link.
btw — I am hereby officially putting up My total SAT score against anyone else's (in our little "community") at one ($1) U.S. Dollar a point. Or just Math or English. See? I keep telling you I'm easy. So, doo you feel lucky, punk? ;o)

Now, don't cry, or anything, but I'm at over 200 words and 1300 points on the word contest. Remember: It's not whether you win or lose, it's how you play the game. And as long as I win, that motto works just fine. You still gots time. Luck to ya. Yer gonna needs it. Seriously, though, it would BE cool to see someone beat Me. I'm not really into all that competition stuff, although I doo like to play, butt I doo more so like to see people realize their potential and achieve and surpass their levels, and doo great things, whatever they may BE. Tune in tomorrow for the results.

Game over. (more or less) Check it out.
Word Contest Results

"Be ashamed to die
          until you have won
      some victory for humanity."

— Horace Mann,   Antioch College's First President

I am
The Lizard King!
They call Me
"Tater Salad"

*laffz* *laffz*



For the Love of Freaking Ass Gawd!

Wherein Popeye offers up a quick (yeah, right) explanatia and apologia as to What in the Hell "this" is all about. (for those who may BE confused, forgetful, new, and/or such)
(please note that this color of pissant yellow is used to refer to and highlight references to people and such who are/ were/ will always BE cowardly, scummy, lowlifes, ASSholes, Idiots, Putzes, and other worthless pieces of shit-trash, and the like, to various degrees and levels, mix and match, etc.... — last updated ~ 10/31/2004 2:27 pm — last time: 7/15/2004 11:10 am)
Once upon a time, not so long ago, in a World Wide InterWebNet seemingly far, far away, or standing right next to you, depending, there was a, shall we say, "community", of people who congregated, so to speak, to discuss various issues and interact accordingly in and via CyberSpace. Most of "us" were interested, for a variety of reasons, in a talk radio show called "Coast to Coast A.M." (or something like that), hosted by one Art Bell (artbell.com — and his "well-known" 'netNazi' webmaster, donut-eater extraordinaire, KKKeith Rowland), and his/their many "interesting" guests, and the 'fascinating topics' (?) they discussed on said show. This was circa 1998, +/-, and for a few years thereafter.
There were a couple of camps, mayBE a few or a handful, mostly divided into those who liked Art Bell and his radio show, and those who did not. More or less. BEtween which there was much discussion, and argument, and fighting, and infighting, and other sundry greater and lesser activities. A good time was had by all. Okay, most. Well, a few of us, anyway. Okay, okay — Mostly Me. (which, as we all well-know, is Most Important) And a small handful of others. More or less. But I digress.
At and around this time, Art Bell changed the direction and flavor of his 'talk radio show' from general news/ talk/ "militia"-related issues and topics to general news/ talk/ paranormal/ "strange". I, for one, think this change was "hastened" by certain events, such as the Oklahoma City Bombing, and related events, and the subsequent rather strong anti-militia aroma that pervaded the times. No matter what some people say, Art Bell ain't (wasn't) dumb. (+/-) Although, more-likely-than-not, it was pure, unAdulteRated dumb-A$$ luck. (yeah, yeah, "life ain't fair", blah-blah-blah, what-ev-er &mdash guess what? there is a Hell — and 'they' have set aside a special place for these people and their illK — and I guarantee it ain't very pleasAnt — yep, not very pleasAnt at all)
Anyway, this ended up as a hugely lucky goldmine for Art Bell, BEcause his 'radio talk show' took off in the ratings and BEcame the most popular late night talk radio show ever, or something like that. Topics on the show changed to include everything from alien abduction to the zodiac, Bigfoot to Yetis, chupacabra sightings to X – The Unknown, demonology to wicca, E.T.'s to voodoo, forteana to UFO's, ghosts to time travel — well, you get the idear and fuzzy piture. [sicK]
Anyways, there were a smattering of web discussion forums, IRC chat rooms, websites and various usenet news groups that followed such topics BEfore, during and after — both pro and con. Such as "My BEloved Howl" © ™,   #hazy,   "Sightings on the Radio" (another wannaBE talk show) at sightings.com (rense.com), and alt.fan.artbell (a.k.a. afab), among many, many others. Not to mention the talk show guests' websites, such as Richard Hoagland's enterprisemission.com, David John Oates' reversespeech.com, Whitley Strieber's strieber.com, and many, many others. A cast of dozens, I dare say. More or less.
And then came "The Feud". Some Idiot in Montana named Robert (a.m.) Stephens, who is a well-known pathological liar (known now, but not so much at the time, until it BEcame WAY too increasingly obvious — hey, he even supposedly fooled the late, 'great' Michael theroux, who at one or more times was Stephens' webmaster, if you can BElieve that, as well) – anyway, to continue, patho-liar and very "questionable" individual, to put it nicely, jumped hip deep into the virtual cow patty we were all creating for ourselves, some knowingly, and others clueless, and splashed everyone, and created ripples and waves and tsunamis. Yuck!
It wasn't all him, although he likes to take credit for it all. (as doo a few other Idiots) There were several other so-called "major players", and a vast host of "minor players", and people who were "in the loop", or thought they were "in the loop", or wanted to BE "in the loop", all who didn't understand (typical) that there was no "loop!", who harmonically masturbated the various situations and events in various ways and means and levels and degrees. And pretty much everything escalated from there. Kind of like a gigantic shit snowball in Hell rolling dunnhill at us all at rather high speed. Ker-Splat!!
And then David John Oates (a.k.a. DJO – of Reverse Speech "fame") and Robert Stephens (a.k.a. RAMS — and what a hilarious joke that moniker is) [ and perhaps others ] apparently got in bed together (don't even ask) after Art Bell kicked both of them off of his radio show and wouldn't let them cum back, and certain words and terms and phrases were used in an apparently derogatory and libelous manners and such about Art Bell (and/or member(s) of his family), and lawsuits and threats of lawsuits and counter-suits and other Flawsuits ensued (oh, my!). For millions of ridiculous dollars all told. (none of which was ever collected, of course — big surprise there — except, of course, for the two (?) deep-pocket Idiots (their employer and/or their employer's insurance company(ies), more likely) back east that were unfathomably stupid enough to call Art Bell a pedophile, or child molester, or whatever it was they said on their live air radio show — yeah, Art Bell retired on that "small" undisclosed $um)
And supporters and detractors and fans and enemies and others took sides and the melee BEgan all over Hell and back again. And a bunch of shit rained down on certain individuals who probably deserved it and upon others who probably did not deserve it. And Game Players (in the very negative sense) played games. And people lied. And people skewed facts and truth — and lies. And people with hidden and camoflauged and obvious agendas acted BEhind the scenes and anywhere else they could. And people did and said all kinds of things that I would rather not go into here. I only have one life to tell this "brief" synopsis, after all. And My time is worth money. BElieve you Me.
And that was all that. And then some. And some Xtreme Losers still can't let it go today. (and some of them probably never will)
And later it was discovered that there were a particularly stupid, ignorant, ASSinine, disgusting, lowlife, slimey, piss coward group of rather extreme Losers who were doing a variety of unethical and hurtful things to certain individuals in the name of "fun". (many of whom just happened to BE in our little "community"; by luck or by golly; on both sides, actually) BEfore, during and after the so-called "Feud". And some of us (quite a small group, unfortunately) decided that what they were dooing was not right and should stop. And so "we" set out to "stop" them. (which has pretty much turned into "I" — which is fine by Me —   Why?   BEcause I can. And someone should. It's a dirty job, butt somebody's gots to doo it. And I volunteer. Free gratis no extra charge. Yer welcome.)
And BEfore you get on yer higher horse, I shall point out that many of "us" tried the "nice" way to achieve our goals BEfore we "got down and dirty", so to speak. However, The Idiots, BEing the type of people they are and choose to BE, for some semi-inexplicable reason (just plain ol' dumbASS stupidity, prolly), associate "weakness" with "goodness" and "niceness". BIG mistake there.   *snicker*   Sure, mayBE with some people, but not all of us. As they soon learned. The hard way.   *snicker*  
A word to the supposedly wise, which is supposed to BE sufficient — In The End, Good shall always prevail over "Evil." (butt especially so when that "evil" is more "wannaBE" than even close to "real" — you know, "dim" rather than "dark", "bad at everything they attempt" rather than "bad ass", etc....)
So, of course, they attacked "us" like they attacked the other unfortunate people who disagreed with them, or spoke out against them, or wouldn't show them the "appropriate amount of respect", or something like that (?), or who they didn't like the looks of, or who had certain traits or characteristics, such as stuttering, or certain diseases, and various other things like that — basically anyone and everyone who they thought was an "easy target", and whom they could irritate, and antagonize, and anger, and bother, and enrage, and upset, and cyber-stalk, and IRL-stalk, and anything else they could think of — not unlike the unfortunate, sad, pathetic, pitiful little Losers who think it is fun and funny to pull the wings off of flies, these people effectively did the same thing to these others, and then laughed about it. Got off on it. Thrived on it. Reveled in it. And *laffz* some more. I'm not kidding. I know it's a bit difficult to BElieve. That people would actually act that way toward others. (but not impossible, as we have all come to see and understand over the years)
The people I'm talking about, the hurtful people, not their (so-called) "victims", are well-known in certain circles. Some of them due to the actions of those of us who decided that they should all BE stopped. They all tried to doo their dirty deeds in anonymity, using nicknames and pseudonyms, and other tricks like that (which they could barely pull off — they are seriously not brite at all). BEhind which they all felt safe and comfy. But, eventually, for a variety of reasons, these false facades have BEen falling away to bring the cowards out into the light. Where they shrink, and fade, and tremble, and writhe in agony, and wither, and "die". A quite cruel and terrible and horrible death, actually. (just ask them) Which is what they all deserve. And then some.
BElieve Me when I say that you would not BElieve Me if I told you about some of the things these Lesser Losers have done to the many, many mostly (relatively) innocent "victims"/targets of theirs.   Seriously.   Suffice to say that these Life-Losers will never fully understand how truly lucky they are that I am a half-way decent person and that therefore they will (probably) never BE the recipients of My full Ire and Wrath. (and that I will never fall to their level of disgusting lowness in word or deed) Those who know what has really gone on over the last several years, especially those unfortunates who have BEen the recipients of these Idiot-Loser's actions, know that My Cause du Jour of the day is Just and Right and Righteous. No need to thank Me (as if most of you would, anyway) — that's not why I am dooing what I doo. (obviously)
Okay, okay, you doone drug it outta Me. Here's just a quick smattering of what they have doone, and to whom they have doone it (no names mentioned to protect the innocent), over the last several years. One of their many modus operandi was to find a group of people with some "trait" or "characteristic", or mutual interest, that usually have an on-line discussion forum, and attack them, using their "problem(s)", or whatever, as the main focus of attack. Or, if they found one specific person, find a "group" to which they BElong, and/or their friends, family, acquaintances, etc.
Like people who stutter, or lisp, or have some mental, emotional, or physical dis-ease, illness, or condition, such as depression, or Chrone's disease, or a weight problem. Or an "alternative" sexual identity ("fags" or "dykes", as they like to refer to them), or a political affiliation, or hobby or general interest, such as aliens or UFO's or wicca, or a religious persuasion, especially Christians, or mothers who love their children and families, but all were open for attack. Basically anyone who was "different" from them, or even like them. Their self-hatred allowed them that, as well.
They would then attack and infiltrate these people's lives, and discussion forums, and IRC chat rooms, and usenet news groups, and whatever else they could think of. Usually they would stick to "cyber-lives" and "on-line life" and activities, often using the "excuse" that "cyber-stuff" isn't "real", which made it "okay", as long as they didn't doo anything to them in their real lives. (IRL) Butt, they often crossed over that line, as well. When it was "convenient", or just happened to suit their fancy at any given time. You know how these type of people operate. They are just as likely to doo anything as not. If they think they can get away with it. Always trying to stay just this side of illegality. And if it was what any decent person thought was unethical, well, that's not illegal, so.... Anything's fair in love and war, right?   Right???
And their attacks would take the form of posting content that spoke against the thoughts and/or ideas and/or BEliefs of the "victims", often taking a nasty, derogatory, hurtful, disgusting, and similar tone. They would make fun of them, like hurtful school children in a playground yard. (and we are talking about adults here, just in case you thought they were children, or young — yeah, I know.... unBElievable, ain't it?) They would harrass them, unmercifully, and "cyber-stalk" them all over the internet. Searching for other groups of which they might BE a part or member. Seeking out their on-line, and sometimes off-line (IRL), acquaintances, friends, family members and sometimes even co-workers and employers. And attack them, if they felt like it, or thought it would bother the initial "victim" as an indirect attack against them.
They would make fun of their problems, dis-eases, illnesses, ideas, BEliefs, and the like. Oftentimes making disgusting, usually sexually-based, explicit images of the people if they could find an online image of them. Like putting their head on a disgusting or pornographic image of people engaged in "nasty" sexual practices (bondage, bdsm, group sex, obese people were a favorite theme, and, of course, homosexuality is always a good attack against most people, and let's not forget pedophilia (which these people think is a perfectly valid attack against anyone, especially if it's not true)), and anything else they could think up with their little, tiny, puny, mentally ill and emotionally ill and spiritually ill, pseudo-creative minds, with added text and such.
Some of their favorite tactics were to call women sluts, whores, cunts, etc., and to call guys fags, homo's, or pedophiles. One time they found an image of a baby with crossed eyes that looked kind of odd and made it look like someone had carved the word "tard" on its forehead as a bloody scab and labeled as the mother's child by name. They liked to refer to children (and others) as "tards", short for "retards". (as it happened, this woman's son was challenged, which they knew beforehand, had discovered in their searches for information to use against the mother and her family) They did these types of things and much, much more.
And, g0d forbid, and how DARE, any one of their "victims"/targets stand up for themselves (and/or others) and speak out against them for what they were dooing and saying and writing (to and about them, and others). Then these people BEcame "super-targets" and even more victimized with even stronger attacks. This is often when they would start searching for and attacking family members, and such, and often going into people's so-called "real lives". This also included anyone who spoke up for and/or tried to help people who they were attacking. Like little ol' Me. (as only one example of a few) Which is why most people wouldn't speak out against them and/or help Me ("us") try to stop them all. Can't blame them too much.... butt they aren't completely blameless, either. (as they well-know; and with which they will have to live, and such — they know who they are — good luck with that)
Some of these unethical ASSholes were also members of a group of people who called themselves "Mockers". Who we sometimes refer to as "Mockers, Inc.", among other terms. They were the people who posted on the Hatesville discussion forum, discussing tactics, joking about what they were dooing and how well it was working and what they would doo next and so on.
And, so, I (along with a few others, initially), decided to give these people a taste of and some doses of their own medicine, so to speak. Let them feel what it's like. This could only BE a good thing, since it would help to increase their levels of empathy and such, and eventually get them to stop what they were dooing to these other people. And it worked (and is working) like a charm. It's ALL Good!
As I likes to say, "I've shoved a large, healthy, super-sized portion of their own medicine down their throats without a spoonful of sugar to help make it go down. And they are gagging, and sputtering, and spitting, and whining, and crying, and pissing and shitting themselves, and having little baby fitz about it all. Poor, poor sproggen boBasTard Putzez ALL. Payback's a Bitch, ain't it? Hurtz like a motherFvcker, don't it?" (in typical fashion, these Xtreme Losers can dish it out, butt they can't take it — who would'a guessed that?)
*snicker*   LOLOL!!!   RotFLMAOBT!!!!!  
Many of them have BEen appropriately and thoroughly whip-spanked, like the scummy, worthless adult-children they are, and have slinked away into the rotten woodwork of what's left of their so-called lives. Most of them, in fact. Several down, and a few to go. Actually, it's probably a never-ending battle, of sorts. Those of us who are decent, upstanding, caring, compassionate, empathetic individuals who BElieve in Right and all other Good things know that these others who are the antithesis of all that is Good and Right are like a slow-witted, pyretic, crapulent, deficient, laughable, absurdly inane bacterial plague on the world. (that piss-shit themselves at the mere thought of old-fashioned "sulfa or weak-batch penicillin" — all the while they think of themselves as some sort of self-styled "superbug" — RotFLOLOL!!!)
And I am The Cure. (among others — although I have BEen fighting this fight to the bitter end, while some others have, unfortunately, fallen along the wayside, most of them for various unfortunate reasons — some of them going to the dim side to effectively, or actually, join the Losers — so sad — this type of work is not for the weak-willed, frail-hearted, slow-witted, feeble-brained, pseudo-principalled, UNethical and low-compassioned and UNcaring but they don't like to see themselves and/or think of themselves that way, even though they very obviously fall under that thrashed, leaky umbrella of self-hatred and self-death, et al.)
So all of that (and more) is what all of this is all about. More or less. So to speak. Just in case you were wondering. Hey! Everyone's gotta have a Hobby. And this is one of My many part-time avocationary pasttimes and pursuits. When I gots a few extra spare moments.
I am Judge, Jury, and Executioner.   Count on it.
And so it goes....         (cue "Ride of the Valkyries" — gotta love Wagner)
p.s. Some of the Losers I'm talking about above are known individually, and grouped, by, or associate with, the following names, nicknames, "groups", websites, etc.:
The Mikey WereLitzerz, TMW discussion forum, Two-Bit Media Whores, "The Knights of Old Navy"; Fellini, Fellini's 8 1/2, Celestin Olani, Celestin d'Olani, Celestin Dolani, CdO, Jessini, Jess, "Tiffany"; Mikey, MickeyX, RobDeNiro, Cameron Vale; "disinfotainment" {webmaster@disinfotainment.com}, disinfotainment.com, disinfotainment.com/tmw/, spamhaus.com; 'ekton graves'; "Mick and Mallory", MalloryX, Sandra, moonbayou, deepgreensea, Pastor Tammy Lynn Jessup, Sandra, Lucy Ferr, Chimaera; Mikey, Michael Theroux, Michael thru-oh, Mikey thru-0, Mikey thru-ø, "Midj", borderlands.com; SpDrMN, Vox Arachnida {blackwidower@}; Skepticult ("members"); Mocker, "The Mockers", "Mockers, Inc.", Moq 1.0, Moq 2.0, Moq 3.0, "the 'members' of the Hatesville discussion forum"; vallor, Scot dopey, Scot Doty; bojango, bo, bojangles; blue ilk; vanilla gorilla; "HH" Hugh (Bris (?) Morles (?) — get it?); David Lee BassTard, {bdavid_lee@hotmail.com}; Joanne bishop ("jojo"); clint williams, "rocky jones, space ranger", rjsr, {rjspaceranger@hotmail.com}; rams, robert stephens, robert a.m. stephens, behold-the-rage.com, {behold_rage@yahoo.com}; "Thomasina Chica Wolverina"; "RCS", Radar Cross Section, Russ, Rusty, The Drunkicide PIMPly-Nell, Sagwa, Runaway Truck Ramp, {alienradiostatic@yahoo.com}; calzone {ngc6611@comcast.net}; pRick jackson; et al., and a cast of dozens, ad infinitum, ad nauseum....
(and continually modified, updated, and corrected for utmost factual accuracy and closest absolute truth.... e-mail Me if you think I have left out something important or made some kind of an error or misstatement, etc.... (last updated — see at top now))
And, now, I bring you the continued and continual and never-ending Most Well-Deserved Biatch Slapping of the New Millennium.... enjoy....
Doo It!!


Note:   All references to the phrase "Niggah, Pleaze", and its various spellings, are a bitch-slap to the Idiot Jess Tiffany (Fellini), who often likes to spout the phrase, and, along with his "friends", like(s/d) to pretend they are "black" in the extremely racist manner and sense that is their basic makeup of who and what they are and choose to be. So it is used occasionally herein to show him, and them, for who and what they really are.