Popeye Theophilus Barrnumb

That pretty much says it all.

Don't you think? What more is there to say?
 
A most excellent biography shall consume this section of textual wonderment. Flowery wordage shall exuberantly sing My praises to the masses. Paragraph upon paragraph will flow like musical melody.
 
And the Truth shall set us free.
 
Count on it.

 
All of My coulrophobic little bwitches need to stop here and go no further. Don't say I didn't warn you. Don't make Me turn this website around. Keep it up and I'll give you something to cry about. Your mileage may vary. What-ev-ar.

 
There are those who have referred to Me as an eVile Klown — and they would BE correct in that designation.
 

The Evil Clown Generator

Don't say I never gave ya nothin'.

Okay, okay.

There are those who say I am a Guardian Angel.

They are mistaken.

I am an Avenging Angel.

Gee. Suddenly, "It all makes sense."

Veni, Vidi, Spurius brutus detruncare!
 
    I came, I saw, I tore the thick bastards limb from limb.
 
          — Popeye Theophilus Barrnumb

...and thus the whirligig of time brings in His revenges...
 
    — Duodecimi Nox – a.V.s.I.
 
Carpe Noctem!   Oh, Solo Me!   Quod Erat Demonstrandum! Requiescant in Pace!   C'est la vie d'guerre!

We are, none of us, alone.
Even as we exhale, it is inhaled by others.
The light that shines upon Me, shines upon My neigbor as well.
In this way, everything is connected to everything else.
In this way, I am connected to My friend, even as I am connected to My enemy.
In this way, there is no difference BEtween Me and My friend.
In this way, there is no difference BEtween Me and My enemy.
We are, none of us, alone.
 
I am always here – BEside you – BEhind you – always near.
 
Always.

Never forget that your enemy does not see himself as evil in his own eyes.
This may allow you to make him your friend.
If not, you can kill him quickly — and without hesitation.

I know indeed what Good I intend to Doo,
but stronger than all My afterthoughts is My Fury –
Fury that brings upon Mortals the greatest Good. — Popeye "YerRIPideas" Barrnumb

For we Pay a Price for Everything we Get or Take in this World;
and although Ambitions are well worth having,
they are not to BE cheaply Won — Lucille Maud Montgomery

They chose to Persecute the 'innocent' — so I gave them Blood to drink....
and they Choked on it. — P.T. Barrnumb

I shall Walk the Earth — and My Hunger shall know No Bounds. — Yew Noe Hoo

The Path of the Righteous Man is beset on all sides by the Iniquities of the Selfish and Petty, and the Tyranny and Bullying of 'evil' men and women — those who attempt to Glory in the Misfortune, and Denigrate the Goodness, of Others.   Blessed BE, am I, who in the Name of Charity and Good Will, Shepherd the Weak through the Valley of Darkness, for I am, in Truth, My Brother's Keeper and the Finder of My Lost Children.   And I will Strike Down upon thee with Great Vengeance and Furious Anger those who would attempt to Poison and Destroy My Brothers and Sisters.   I will take Fierce Revenge on them and Punish them with My Wrath and Fury.   They shall Know Me, by My Mercy, by My Deeds, by My Words, and you will know My name is Popeye Theophilus Barrnumb when I lay My Vengeance upon thee.  
As it is written, so shall it BE doone.   So say We all.